By Buddy

Mom Has A Dream

by Dad, Posted on

Vickie woke up and stared at the ceiling. It was 4:30, and was expected at the photo shoot at 6:30, leaving her with just a little time to prep before leaving. She prepped, then waited for her chauffeur to arrive. When he did they exchanged some boring small talk, none of it worth mentioning, and even if it was she couldn’t remember what was said anyway.

She arrived to her shoot at 6:30, went through the extremely boring poses, dealt with all the people being insincerely kind to her, and generally did what she was supposed to do. She could make a scene, but it would only result in hundreds of reporters harassing her about it, attacking her because she was fed up with the insincerity that seemed to surround her everywhere. She could see the headline now. ‘Clooney Wife Loses It At Photo Shoot’ Then it’d be some article basically slandering her and proclaiming she was the next Hitler.

After the photo shoot, she went and got lunch at some café, and dealt with reporters asking her provoking questions, either that or extremely boring ones like swimsuit preference. After this she went home, and sat on the couch and ate celery alone while skimming her twitter, because there was literally nothing else to do.

She got in an argument with some radical hater, and although she was sure her agent was going to chew her out about it, she didn’t care, and was not afraid to publically shame someone who was so bad-natured. After this, she decided to go to a salon, because there was honestly nothing better to do.

She went to the salon and got her nails done, but they weren’t even done how she wanted. At this point she couldn’t find the reason to actually care, tipped the Asian who did the job, and had her chauffeur pick her up. She had walked here originally, but no longer felt like being alone.

His company didn’t carry much substance. When she got home she didn’t really have anything to look forward to. She ended up eating dinner with George, but as always, she only saw him maybe a few times a week, and it was always incredibly lacking in much emotion or even conversation that seemed relevant.

She had it. There seemed to be nothing to do, so she took the keys to his Camaro, and went for a little spin. She was heading towards a drag race track, and even though she knew it would only result in chaos in the media, she went along anyways. As she passed through an intersection, she suddenly saw the semi that slammed into her.

Vickie woke up and looked to her side. Gus, her youngest son, 6 at the time, had a nightmare and was tugging her shirt. She looked to her left and saw Eric, and gave Gus a hug, and got up to talk with him and make him feel better.

Bella Makes A Deal

by Dad, Posted on

Bella laid on her bed absent-mindedly and stared at an episode of Parks and Rec while she waited. It was 4 AM, and she had been expecting the delivery at 3 AM. She tabbed over to her OurWorld and attempted to login to the proxy account. She logged in, but it still hadn’t been delivered. She was expecting at least forty-three thousand gems on this account, but she hadn’t heard anything from Rachel, who was one of the higher ups in the pyramid scheme.

She didn’t panic. But, she was getting bored, so she went downstairs and played some Town of Salem. She had ended up with Survivor, probably the worst role in the game. She sighed, and told everyone she was the survivor. The next round, she was killed by the serial killer.

‘Who needs Town of Salem anyway?’ She thought as she checked her kik. She had a message from Rachel, the delivery had gone through. It had been late because of an internet issue. At this point she went back up and stocked another one of her OurWorld accounts and posted it on ebay for nine hundred dollars.

But she was still unhappy that her underlings hadn’t delivered promptly, so she went to her basement and grabbed her burner cellphone. She called Mike, one of her favorite reptile sellers. After some small talk she convinced him to deliver a couple live crocodiles with their mouths muzzled. She wasn’t looking to hurt anyone, but a message needed to get across.

You see, Bella was the leader of the most successful scamming scheme you might have a chance to get involved in on OurWorld. She was in college to become a reptile veterinarian, but it actually didn’t take much of her time to run the scamming scheme because she had gained many loyal followers and was able to set up a pyramid scheme type deal.

She was very bored. She decided to go draw some anime people with weird noses, her usual go-to when she couldn’t think of anything to do. A half hour later, she had resulted in a beautiful picture except a very bizarre looking nose. Satisfied, she hung it on the wall. Her phone buzzed.

She checked it. Her account on ebay had sold, but more importantly, her komodo dragon was being delivered at about noon. It was pretty early, only 7 AM. So she went to bed and woke up at eleven, put on some makeup and waited.

Someone knocked at the door. She opened it to a nervous looking UPS driver holding a leash to an unhappy looking komodo dragon. She signed off, and took it inside, saddled it up, and rode it into the sunset.